|Ref & Res:
Top Ten Ways To Post Like
A Conspiracy Lunatic
10. Have no sense of humor, irony or whimsy.
9. The fact that an "official" investigation shows there was no conspiracy is not evidence that the conspiracy does not exist; rather, it is evidence that the conspiracy does exist. Otherwise, why would they deny it?
8. Use "quotation" marks, *highlighting*, CAPITAL LETTERS and exclamation points!!!! indiscriminately.
7. Follow up every non-sequitor with "COINCIDENCE?"
6. The most tenuous of connections between a person who debunks your theory and the alleged conspirators is cause to disregard the debunker.
5. Insert examples of how your personal life has been wrecked because the conspirators know you are on to them. If your significant other has left you, it's not because of the tinfoil hat you've taken to wearing, it's because "they" got to him or her.
4. Always put commonly accepted descriptions in quotation marks.
3. Insist that the experts know nothing, and that all you need is the Bible, the Constitution, Black's Law Dictionary and a handgun to prove your point.
2. Make it up as you go along.
And the Number One Way to Post Like a Conspiracy Lunatic:
1. You're not cleared for that.